Monday, October 31, 2011

"Are you serious?!?"

     I've been short on money this month.  I'm working hard still trying to set up my new apartment and pay off my debts back in the States.  One thing last year that I would sometimes allow to slip was my tithing, but I was determined to not let that be the case this time around.  So even though it would make a huge dent in what I could spend on social activities and other wants, I willingly gave back what I knew already belonged to God.  For the next couple weeks I watched every dollar spent.  I had already planned to attend a servant's retreat for all those at our church that serve in ministry.  When it was originally announced the cost was 90,000 won for singles which is close to $90.  Knowing it would be worth it I went ahead and signed up.  Then the church worked out some kind of discount for everyone so we only ended up paying 80,000 won.  I paid the money at an ATM by transferring it into our church's account.  Turns out I transferred it into the general account instead of the retreat account.  The church's administrative assistant, Nanah, notified me and she got it all sorted out.  Because of work I was only able to go to the retreat Friday night instead of Friday afternoon.  Unknowingly this made the price even cheaper!!  On Sunday Nanah found me and gave me back 10,000 won ($10).  I was thrilled.
     Then today, Monday, I went home to clean a bit on my break.  As I was throwing some laundry into the washer I noticed something blueish/green stuck in this tiny cavity in the washer.  I pulled it out and it was 12,000 won ($12)!  I stood up with a stupid grin on my face and literally laughed out loud and said, "Are you serious?!?  Man God, you're cool."  Then I laughed at myself some more for saying all of this out loud.  That's two days in a row that He's provided for me in a totally unexpected manner.  Recently the Lord has been showing me that I've had my priorities a little backwards.  He's revealing that I have been loving others, then loving Him.  He has been teaching me this through relationships, conversations, internal dialogue and of course His Word.  Well, today something clicked.  After this physical manifestation of His love, all I wanted to do was spend time with Him.  Here it is, Halloween Day in the world around me, but it feels more like Valentine's Day.  While I was talking with Him, He said to me, "see how I love you?"  Then again later on He said, "I love doing things like this for you."  It was such a special time for me and the one who loves me most.  Yes, it is only $22.00 that we are really looking at here, but it is not at all about the amount.  It is about Him showing His deep love for me.  I remember losing those $12 I found in the washer.  I remember checking my pockets for it and just assuming that I had carelessly spent it.  He didn't have to open my eyes at the time when He knew I needed it.  I've done many loads of laundry since I lost the money and had never noticed it before.  I think there are multiple lessons to be learned here.  Obedience to tithing cheerfully knowing it is a sacrifice returns a blessing.  God keeps His promises to take care of us.  He gives us abundantly more than we can ask or imagine.  And the one that I'm learning most of all, He loves me and wants me to love Him more than any other.  He is jealous of my time, attention, affection.  When it was time for me to return to work after my break.  I closed my prayer saying this, "I love you.  I will continue to try and grasp your love for me.  I wish I could love you as much as you love me."   I look forward to more, "Man God, you're cool" moments in the future.

It is a front loading washer, you see where it got stuck?

Ridiculous, that I even saw it. LOL!